New Zealand Listener Issue 47, 2025

New Zealand Listener Te Kaiwhakarongo Aotearoa Editor Kirsty Cameron Chief Subeditor Geoff Cumming Managing Editor Ruth Brown  Art Director Derek Ward  Books Editor Mark Broatch  Entertainment & Arts Editor Russell Baillie  Digital Editor Dionne Christian  Content Producer Louise Barnes  Subeditors Richard Betts, Bevan Rapson  Senior Designer Richard Kingsford Editorial contact listener@aremedia.co.nz Contributors this issue: Russell Brown, Jane Clifton, Michael Cooper, Greg Dixon, Anthony Ellison, Eric Frykberg, Andrea Graves, David Harvey, Bernard Lagan, Danyl McLauchlan, Sophie Moullin, Whena Owen, Nicky Pellegrino, Graham Reid, Alex Scott, Chris Slane, Aaron Smale, Andy Tristram, Sarah Watt, Marc Wilson Chief Executive Officer Jane Huxley  General Manager Stuart Dick  Editorial Director Sarah Henry  Head of Digital Melissa Walsh  Senior Digital Content Producer Katie Delany  Sales Director Claire Chisholm  Senior Account Managers Amy Madden Amy.Madden@aremedia.co.nz Chloe Jordan…

When my 15-year-old granddaughter was sexually assaulted, we came to understand the term “categorical denier”. We came to learn that physical abuse was just one part of the torment our girl suffered. A categorical denier is one who, instead of admitting to or excusing or minimising the offence, completely denies what happened and accuses the survivor of lying. “The worst part was the aftermath,” my granddaughter told me. “His family spreading all this stuff; it was so overwhelming. I didn’t want to say anything at school but the rumours were already there. Boys saying, ‘Girls lie, that’s what they do.’ There’s no way to prove what happened and it’s never-ending.” Surveys about sexual abuse in our country have found: • One in three NZ women are sexually assaulted. • Nearly…

I am surprised the authorities are still comparing the New Zealand workplace fatality rate with the Australian and UK rates when they are not comparing similar databases (“Doing without the canary,” November 15). According to latest research, our record is said to be twice as bad as Australia’s and four times as bad as the United Kingdom’s. The government is apparently proposing to make changes in order to close the gap but that is not likely to happen because of ACC. I have travelled widely over Europe, UK, Canada and Australia advising on, and fixing, workers’ compensation schemes and lecturing at conferences and law schools on our ACC system. It is no wonder our data is so different from other countries, because many countries I visited are established as federations…

There’s a group in Kohi’s High Tide club swims most days to the Yellow Buoy. I had been one until, aged 90, I passed out on my way back and came to in the world of Underwater where only a week before I’d met a whale, a young Southern Right, maybe an omen. So I’ve never been back to that buoy, and yesterday one of the group, Gary, who always called me CK, eager in every weather and loved by us all died in the water and couldn’t be revived. Out at the yellow today his mates spread flowers and gave three cheers. His daughter told me Gary would have been pleased to die with an audience. ‘He was theatrical.’ She was like him, loud and cheerful. Gary Williams died…

For our Competition No 120, we asked you to write a limerick on the downfall of Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor. FINALISTS: Andrew, favourite son of the Queen Is a washed-up, disgraced has-been His fall from grace A slap in the face For fraternising with … Epstein ‒ Mavis McGregor, Hamilton The former prince once the Queen’s fave Has now been demoted to knave He will have to find work For he’s lost all his perks As he never learned how to behave. ‒ Kathy Clark, Palmerston North His brother and landlord, now king, Saw Andrew kept doing his thing So he warned him no more Took the locks off all doors And said, “Brother, don’t bother to ring” ‒ Harry Kerr, Dunedin Once he was a prince amongst men But he pushed…

“Traffic management plans, and site plans, and health and safety violations, I mean all that stuff’s important up till a point, but seriously, it’s just a market in an empty car park … it’s not actually rocket science.” “These grasshoppers are so unique. They look almost prehistoric. They can jump fairly well but are renowned for their clumsy landings.” “Without a million bucks you inherited from your father, you’d be a guy in Queens who lost his job selling vacuums door to door.”  “Quiet, piggy.”  “Deadpan stupidity is a precision tool. Ask the question so confidently that knowledge trips over its own shoelaces. Then let the silence do the marking while everyone realises how funny certainty looks like with its labels upside down.”  “I’m in two minds about [Climate Change…