Innholdsfortegnelse for June 2018 i Young Parents

“I want to quit my job to spend more time with pmy kids.” When a mum says this, other mums nod in empathy. But how would you react if a dad said it? One of the fathers we interviewed in this issue (page 60) did that – twice. The first time was when his oldest child was just a toddler and he was travelling so much that he saw his son only on weekends. The second time was when he only had about an hour with his kids on weekdays. “At the end of the day, I asked myself, what is it that I want out of life? And to me, the kids are of utmost importance,” he told us. Out of that soul searching came the idea for a…

How do I discipline my kid positively? Discipline involves helping children develop self-control. It is about setting limits and correcting behaviour, through encouragement, modelling and experience, rather than punishment. Remember, it is normal that your child pushes boundaries to see what is and isn’t acceptable. When things go wrong, you should: • Show her how to make amends if she’s too young to do it alone. • Expect restitution if rules have been broken. For example, make sure the toy is returned. • Take action yourself. Say sorry if you have broken a rule or hurt someone’s feelings. • Allow natural consequences. If your child has forgotten to bring her workbook, let her be reminded by her teacher. • Set and apply reasonable restrictions, including grounding or removal of privileges.…

What measures can Q I take if my toddler is overweight? A Don’t be fixated by the absolute weight gain; you should look at the growth chart in the health booklet issued by the hospital at birth. The chart allows your child’s growth and development to be compared against his peers. If you find that your toddler is very large for his age – for example, he is among the higher percentile of the growth curve – take these steps. DO NOT OVERFEED Every child is born with an ability to self-regulate his own feeding. Understand his cues for hunger and fullness, and respond appropriately. Avoid forcing him to eat when he refuses food. Just remove the unfinished portion without fussing over it. RECOGNISE HIS STOMACH CAPACITY It is unrealistic…

Your threenager can certainly dig his heels in – when he doesn’t want to do something, he can stand his ground no matter what you say. At times, he acts as if he is the boss at home, not you, and it’s hard staying cool when your child refuses to cooperate. Here are strategies to manage your stubborn, unhelpful preschooler: Keep control of your temper Despite your best intentions, your blood may start to boil when your three-year-old refuses to cooperate with you. If you think you are close to exploding, remove yourself from the situation – while making sure he is safe – and don’t come back until your temper has cooled. Don’t anticipate confrontations The problem with your child’s repeated noncooperation is that you start to expect a…

MAKE THE MOST OUT OF IT Just like many parents, Tan Meng Wei longed for work-life balance. But that goal was near impossible in one of his previous jobs. Then a management consultant at Boston Consulting Group, he had to fly out of Singapore every Monday and catch the last flight home on Friday. “I was travelling way too much and I wanted to spend more time with my eldest son who was 1.5 years old then,” recalls the 45-year-old, who has a brood of four - Matthian, 16; Danelle, 13; Merrick, 11; and Deborah, eight. So, he quit his job and joined Standard Chartered Bank, where he was only required to travel once a month. During a business flight, he decided to branch out into the preschool industry and…

CULTIVATE SELF-MOTIVATION Encourage your children to develop hobbies that don’t relate to their studies. “If they have a reason to finish their work on time, it will give them the incentive to work smart. Also get them to set achievable targets and reward them with positive comments,” says Helen Marijan, CEO and director of studies at Lorna Whiston Schools. TEACH YOUR CHILD TO MANAGE STRESS WELL • Remind him to breathe Ask him to close his eyes for a few minutes and take slow, deep breaths whenever he feels stressed. If need be, get him to do a physical activity to take his mind off his studies for a bit. Squeezing a stress ball may also work, especially for kinaesthetic learners, who crave bodily movements while studying. • Let him practise mental…

Wendy Jacobs is right on time for our interview. It’s a welcomed surprise, knowing she is a mother to five, and that time must be an ever-precious commodity to her. Still, she shows up at the Orchard Road cafe and greets me warmly and calmly, despite, she admits sheepishly, almost losing her car keys just 10 minutes before. It takes a great deal to get Wendy ruffled. It’s clear the South African stunner still knows her way around a shoot. At 42, Wendy possesses the energy of models half her age, nailing pose after pose as she transforms from a “soccer mum”, in sneakers and track pants, to a Romantic-inspired fashion maven in a flowy Prada blouse, and a sleek powerhouse in a Johanna Ortiz romper. She can be bitingly…

At 20, Irfan is the eldest of the five siblings; he is reserved and quiet, while18-year-old Ikhsan has a playful air to him and values his independence. And don’t be fooled by Iman’s fresh-faced appearance – the 17-year-old former track-and-field athlete is articulate and confident. Rounding up the gorgeous brood of five are boys Ilhan, 14, and Iryan, 11, who have the same great genes in both the looks and soccer skills department. Most importantly, the eldest three – who previously enrolled at the Singapore Sports School – are learning to step out from the shadows of their well-known parents. And, they are doing it on their own terms. As the eldest, the onus is on Irfan’s shoulders to set a good example for the rest. “He is the other…

Bingo may have been popular during Grandma’s time, but this beautifully designed toy brings it back to life for a new generation. Now, you can teach your preschooler about maths using this classic number matching game. When Junior outgrows it, use it as a decorative accessory instead. Kiko+ Gatcha Gatcha bingo pinball machine, $85, from www.cuckoolittlelifestyle.com…

DANIEL WU The actor, who recently starred in the Lara Croft movie remake, Tomb Raider, says fatherhood has changed his worldview. He told The Star newspaper: “Before, I would just take on jobs just to keep busy. Now, family is my number 1 priority and work has taken second place to that.” He also won #dadgoal points when he shared a photo of his daughter’s braided hair on Instagram (@thatdanielwu). “Big win for 2018! I braided my daughter’s hair. Elsa ain’t got nothin’ on this!” he wrote in the caption. ANDIE CHEN The 33-year-old dad has no qualms about looking after his two kids – kids – Aden, four, and Avery, two. Whether it’s showering, feeding, putting them to bed or changing their diapers, he has done it all. He…

Gotta catch ’em all How good are your ball-catching skills? Your toddler may just outshine you – with help from this smart toy. As he pushes and walks the digger, a ball pops up from the smoke stack and instinctively lands in the scoop bucket before it gets thrown back into the vehicle. (It worked seamlessly three out of five times when we tried, but that’s still fascinating!) Then the fun action starts all over again. Your little one won’t even realise that he’s honing his walking skills while he’s at it. Vtech Pop-a-ball Pop & Drop Digger, $89.90, from leading department stores…

Andrew Marshall, a marital expert in Britain and the author of I Love You, But I’m Not In Love With You, shares the classic telltale signs. • You can’t be bothered to speak to your partner, and you think: “What’s the point?”. • Your spouse says “Oh, it’s nothing” to a problem that you know exists. • You believe that the problem will magically disappear. • You have sex infrequently. • You have plenty of family time, but almost non-existent couple time.…

There is a hardly a couple who doesn't have arguments, especially when they have kids. Yet, no child likes to see Mum and Dad fight with each other. Consider the negative impact: First, if you spend too much time squabbling with each other, you'll have less time for her. Second, it creates a tense and strained atmosphere at home; and third, she doesn't want to see the people she loves in dispute. Here are strategies to help you work things out so your little one won't get upset. Keep your fights away from her Of course, there will be times when arguments erupt spontaneously between you and your spouse in front of your toddler. Where possible, delay the arguments until she is not around. Don’t ask your toddler to take…

Your tween’s identity – that is, her sense of “self”, her understanding of who she is, her view of her personal characteristics, skills and attributes – continues to form during the tween years. Her identity is influenced by many factors, such as her parents, friends, teachers, siblings, successes and failures, and experiences. Amidst all of these, Dad has a distinctive effect on her identity, as well. Dad usually has a special connection with his tweenager, and so has a special contribution to make to her identify formation. Here are our top 10 strategies for a father to help his primary schooler build a strong and positive view of herself. That said, bear in mind that they apply as much to boys as girls. Mums also have a vital part to…

Remember when PSLE top scorers were so admired that they became poster kids for tuition centres and brain-friendly chicken essence? Parents and kids tuned in to the media to listen to them share their secrets of academic success. Muhammad Saad Siddiqui, (pictured left) who was the top Indian pupil in 2009 with a score of 277, recalls his 15 minutes of fame, right outside Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) where he studied. He told The Straits Times (ST): “The poster was up in front of my school for the first six months of Secondary 1. It was novel and it did get me noticed a little.” The 21-year-old will be starting a human, social and political sciences course at Cambridge University in September. Rebecca Jeyaraj topped her cohort with a score of…

Bright Path Preschool The latest addition to the local inclusive preschool scene, Bright Path Preschool opened this year. It is led by psychologist Angelin Chua, who has 10 years of clinical experience. This premium full-day preschool programme pairs the Busy Bees Group’s award-winning early childhood experience – 30 years across brands such as Learning Vision and Pat’s Schoolhouse – with early intervention techniques. The advisory team comprises Busy Bees’ founding members John Woodward and Margaret Randles, and Dr Diana Lea Baranovich, an associate professor at the department of educational psychology and counselling at the University of Malaya. At Bright Path, your kid gets to learn through an individualised, child-centred programme tailored to suit his learning style, abilities and needs. This means lessons are reviewed and refined frequently, and teachers are…

1996: WEDDING BELLS Wendy and Fandi tied the knot in December that year. Naturally, their wedding was a high-profile affair, and over 10,000 well-wishers attended the reception held on a football pitch in Yishun. 2008: JAKARTA CALLING Fandi and Wendy relocated to Indonesia with their children, Irfan, Iman, Iryan, Ilhan and Ikhsan. It was the same year Wendy had her accident and developed complications which left her close to death. 2014: MODEL MUM Ever the proud parents, Wendy and Fandi were there to cheer on daughter Iman at the finals of the The New Paper New Face modelling competition. Iman won the Miss Popularity and New Look Miss Fashionista titles that year. 2017: CRAZY IN LOVE Wendy and Fandi celebrated their 21st wedding anniversary. “The flame is still there,” Wendy…

unicorn birthday cake Serves 16 Ingredients 135ml warm water 65g cocoa powder 225g Nutella, or other chocolate hazelnut spread 280g plain or cake flour ¾ tsp baking powder 1½ tsp baking soda (bicarbonate of soda) ¾ tsp salt 180ml milk 1 tbsp vanilla extract 1½ tsp white wine vinegar 250g unsalted butter 165g caster sugar 3 eggs Swiss meringue buttercream 245ml egg whites 400g caster sugar 600g unsalted butter 1 tsp salt 1 ½ tsp vanilla extract Decoration 80g white fondant 2 to 3 drops gold edible paint a few drops of vodka 2 to 3 drops of different food colourings of your choice 2 to 3 drops black food colouring Sprinkles, macarons, cookies or lollies (optional) Fondant horn and ears 1 Make the horn and ears a few days…

send us your child’s best photo & win! Each child featured on this page wins a fabulous Young Parents goodie bag worth $40. To take part, hashtag #ypcutie when you post your child’s photo on Instagram. Make sure your account is public so we can see your photos. Terms and conditions apply.…