Innholdsfortegnelse for 7-Jan-16 i You South Africa

AS WE leave the old year behind, many of us feel frazzled from a festive season spent at close quarters with extended families. So instead of looking forward to a fresh new year, we might be on edge and quick to explode. January is apparently the most popular month for divorce for just these reasons. But if you see your relationship in this kind of peril, step back, take a deep breath and read our feature on page 18. Therapist John Bradshaw has a new book, Post-Romantic Stress Disorder, with advice on how to divorce-proof your marriage and find a rewarding kind of love that really can last a lifetime. I reckon the article is a must-read for all married couples. And definitely a good place to start before you…

SHE may not be a blue blood by birth but she’s undeniably the most watched and most admired royal in the world. The Duchess of Cambridge has come a long way since her awkward early days as Prince William’s girlfriend. In becoming wife to the third in line to the throne, Kate (33) had to seriously up the ante in the style stakes, swopping her comfy knee-high boots for court shoes and cowboy hats for fascinators. When she first debuted as William’s fiancée in November 2010 her transformation to the elegant, safe, gentrified style was complete. Her now-famous royal blue engagement dress was a far cry from the neon yellow shorts she was snapped in at a Rollerblade rink in 2008 – and since then the demure duchess has rarely…

Princess Elisabeth, Duchess of Brabant First in line to the throne of Belgium Daughter of King Philippe and Queen Mathilde (age 14) Catharina-Amalia, Princess of Orange First in line to the throne of the Netherlands Daughter of Queen Máxima and King Willem-Alexander (age 12) Princess Ingrid Alexandra Second in line to the throne of Norway Granddaughter of King Harald V, daughter of Crown Prince Haakon and Crown Princess Mette-Marit (age 11) Prince Christian, Count of Monpezat Second in line to the throne of Denmark Son of Crown Prince Frederik and Crown Princess Mary (age 10) Princess Estelle, Duchess of Östergötland Second in line to the throne of Sweden Daughter of Crown Princess Victoria and Prince Daniel, Duke of Västergötland (age 3) Leonor, Princess of Asturias (right) First in line to…

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EVERY school day brings its challenges, from playground scrapes to classroom high jinks – and kids need clothes that aren’t only comfortable but can also withstand the scuffles of childhood. Having been a part of school life for generations of South Africans, Toughees has proved equal to the task. Toughees products are easy to care for and keep their crisp new look for longer, so your children can feel proud of their uniform. With details such as reinforced pockets and increased durability, they always look as if it’s the first day of school. Toughees products are machine washable and require minimal ironing, making life easier for you. WHAT’S TOPS ABOUT TOUGHEES 1 TRUSTED QUALITY Toughees has always been the go-to brand for strong shoes and now you can get the…

t – teaspoon/s T – tablespoon/s c – cup/s WHAT to have for lunch at work is a daily dilemma for many of us. Follow the latest trend and pack a salad for lunch. They’re healthier and tastier than canteen food and require little effort. What’s more, there’s no mess and the jars are reusable. CURRIED CHICKEN AND NECTARINE SALAD Whisk together 125 ml (½ c) yoghurt, 125 ml (½ c) coconut milk, 15 ml (1 T) red curry paste, 10 ml (2 t) lemon juice and a pinch of sugar. Spoon a little of the dressing into the bottom of a jar and store the rest in the fridge for later use. Pack 125 ml (½ c) shredded leftover roast chicken on top of the dressing, followed by 125…

MEDICAL FUND Find out which doctors, hospitals and other medical service providers in your area belong to your fund’s network. Funds negotiate special rates with their network suppliers and the savings are passed on to you. Try to treat everyday ailments yourself, but if in doubt see a doctor. Some think they lose the money in their savings account if they don’t use it so spend it all unnecessarily. But they’re wrong. This is your money; you don’t lose it. So use it wisely, Dries la Grange of BestMed says. INSURANCE Check that your short-term insurer rewards members who claim responsibly and gives you a discount if you’ve improved the safety measures for your property and vehicles, advises Lizette Erasmus of IntegriSure. If you can afford to do it, you…

MANSFIELD PARK by Jane Austen I like Emma too – I did a version of it – but this story has a lot of meat. Of all the Austens, I would choose this. THE FAMOUS FIVE BOOKS by Enid Blyton I thought this series was wonderful. It struck me as a great injustice that they were having adventures and I wasn’t. THE CONSERVATIONIST by Nadine Gordimer Some of her novels were very beautiful. This won the Booker Prize. It’s a book of grave beauty. COLLECTED SHORTER POEMS: 1927-1957 by WH Auden His work became the greatest literary enthusiasm of my life – I always travel with a copy in my suitcase. A PATTERN LANGUAGE by Christopher Alexander It’s about how we can live in harmony with our surroundings if they’re…

The best way to learn is to read. But of course we don’t read books just to take in information. Reading is a great way to relax and go on a fantastic journey of the imagination. Just think about the bedtime stories your parents read to you when you were younger. Reading expands your vocabulary, exercises your memory, relieves tension and develops special parts of your brain which help you to understand things. And it’s great entertainment. Unlike when you watch TV, you can imagine the characters yourself and decide what the places where the story unfolds look like.…

THERE were plenty of fabulous and fairytale-like things that happened during her reign – and there was a fair share of the fun and peculiar too. Like the time she tried to eat prawns using chopsticks and, because it wasn’t etiquette to take the shells off by hand, sent one flying into a candelabra! “Fortunately everyone just laughed,” Rolene Strauss says with a charming smile. She’d been dining with an influential Vietnamese businessman and wanted to show respect for the Asian tradition of eating with chopsticks. It was just one of the many little things she was expected to do while flying around the world as Miss World 2014, Rolene reflects now that she’s handed over the crown. She had to work her way through a thick file containing do’s…

JAYDEN’S SCHOOL PROJECT UNAWARE of why I was being bombarded for information, I gave all the answers to my nine-year-old great-grandson, Jayden. Later he gave me a paragraph to check and I felt humbled and gave him a hug. It was for a school project. I made a copy for myself, which I later framed. He wasn’t impressed: according to him it was fake. Why? His reply, “It’s a photocopy.” I had to agree. I suggested he write it out again so I could have an original work, which he duly did. I have now the following (original) words framed with pride: “My hero is my great-grand mother Joan Bedderson. She helps me with my school homework everyday after school. She is 78½ years old. She will be 79 on…

Crown Princess Mary (43) DENMARK Married to Frederik, Crown Prince of Denmark, and mother to Prince Christian (10), Princess Isabella (8), Prince Vincent and Princess Josephine (both 4). Prince Frederik (47) met his beautiful Australian wife at a pub in Sydney but since their wedding day in 2004, Princess Mary has ruled the red carpet with her seemingly effortless elegance. It’s no surprise she was named the world’s most stylish royal in a poll by Hello! magazine for the past two years running. The former advertising manager is known for her regal, sophisticated taste. Patron of the Copenhagen Fashion Summit, she favours whimsical whites and cream gowns at formal events. But that’s not to say she doesn’t enjoy the odd risk – every now and then a show-stopping neon dress…

Prince Carl Philip, Duke of Värmland (36) SWEDEN Third in line to the throne Single? Sorry ladies – the man widely thought to be Europe’s most handsome prince is newly married to Crown Princess Sofia, who’s pregnant with their first baby, due in April. Crown Prince Hamdan Bin Mohammed Bin Rashid Al Maktoum (33) DUBAI First in line to the throne Single? Yes! The crown prince is an avid diver, amateur skydiver and an accomplished poet. Prince Amedeo, Archduke of Austria-Este (29) BELGIUM Sixth in line to the throne Single? Nope – the royal and business analyst wed Italian journalist Elisabetta Maria Rosboch von Wolkenstein last year. Prince Félix Léopold Marie Guillaume (31) LUXEMBOURG Second in line to the throne Single? No – Prince Félix wed Princess Claire in 2013,…

HE WAS the one who begged her to have children – it’s all he ever wanted. Yet now he’s left his teenage daughters in the lurch and is in serious maintenance arrears of nearly R1,2 million. “Willem was desperate for children,” says Nicole Noordien, the estranged wife of Willem de Klerk, in an exclusive interview with YOU. The son of former president FW de Klerk (79) wanted her to get pregnant, which is why she’s so angry about him shirking his responsibility now. The Randburg Magistrates’ Court found Willem (49) guilty of failing to pay maintenance and ordered him to pay Nicole R600 000 despite him being more than R1 million in arrears. An earlier court ruling had ordered him to pay R18 000 a month maintenance for the kids…

SHE stares out from her Facebook page, defiant, challenging, strange. Her T-shirt reads, “Never underestimate the power of a woman.” Clearly a message to anyone looking. And look they do – Melanie Gaydos of Connecticut in the US is certainly no conventional beauty. The 27-year-old is one of a growing band of models challenging stereotypical ideas of beauty. She suffers from ectodermal dysplasia, a group of rare genetic syndromes that causes pores, teeth, nails and small bones to develop abnormally. She also has alopecia – a condition that results in hair loss – and is partially blind due to an eyelash growth that injured her eyes when she was a child. Her life has been anything but a fairytale – as a young woman she underwent between 30 and 40…

YOU’VE done everything you need to do to prepare for your child’s first day of school. You’ve bought the schoolbag, labelled the stationery, ironed the uniform and polished the shoes. But what if your child isn’t actually ready? “People often believe children reach the same level of maturity at the same age,” says Anel Annandale, a Cape Town educational psychologist. “But their emotional development can differ.” That’s why you shouldn’t assume your child is school-ready just because they’ll turn seven in their first year at school, as the government requires. “School readiness has as much to do with emotional readiness and independence as cognitive ability,” says Johannesburg counselling psychologist Keshnie Lalbahadur. Here’s what you need to know and how you can prepare your child for school. DOES YOUR CHILD MEET…

GOURMET BRAAI TOASTIES Give this old favourite a new twist with homemade bacon and onion jam or sunflower seed and herb pesto. SERVES 4Preparation: 15 minCooking: 25 min BACON AND ONION JAM 250 g streaky bacon,roughly chopped2 onions, sliced60 ml (¼ c) balsamicvinegar60 ml (¼ c) brownsugarsalt and pepper PESTO 80 ml (¹/3 c)sunflower seeds, toasted10 g rocket10 g fresh parsley1 garlic clove, crushed15 ml (1 T) lemon juice125 ml (½ c) olive oilsalt TOASTIES 1 ouma bread loaf,sliced2 tomatoes, sliced10 g rocket1 red onion, sliced150 g mozzarellacheese, grated 1 Bacon and onion jam Fry the bacon in a pan until crisp. Add the onions and stir-fry for a minute. Add the vinegar and sugar and stir-fry for 10 minutes or until thick and syrupy. Season with salt and pepper.…

MISSION: IMPOSSIBLE – ROGUE NATION 2015. 126 min. 13V. Action adventure. R115* Like the Fast & Furious franchise but with added smarts and wit, the Mission: Impossible series has gone from strength to strength despite the odds. In this fifth instalment America’s answer to James Bond, Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise), is once again caught in a desperate struggle, this time to prove shadowy terrorist organisation The Syndicate exists before the CIA can capture him following the disbandment of his unit, the Impossible Missions Force. During his global hunt for evidence Hunt encounters mysterious Syndicate agent Ilsa Faust (Rebecca Ferguson), who agrees to help him. But on whose side is Ilsa really? Like Mad Max: Fury Road, Rogue Nation promotes its main female character to co-lead and is all the better…

CAPRICORN 21 DECEMBER – 20 JANUARY Ponder your path but don’t grumble After an absence of only a few days thoughtful Mercury moves back into your sign, giving you a second chance to mull over your plans for the year ahead. You might in any case be in a pensive mood, so a time of introspection is quite fitting. It’s good to ponder, but don’t grumble. Not being in a talkative mood might cause difficulties in your relationships, especially with family members. YOUR LUCKY NUMBERS 14, 36, 46, 42, 18, 1 AQUARIUS JAN 21 – FEB 18 It’s a week marked by sudden changes and unexpected disruptions. This shouldn’t bother an unpredictable Aquarius, but keep it in mind when making arrangements and have alternatives in place. Although working behind the…

BOOKS UNDER THREAT In history there have been several leaders and political parties who were so keenly aware of the power of books they resorted to banning certain titles and even burnt books. 1525 William Tindale completed the first translation of the Bible into English. The Roman Catholic Church considered this a crime and burnt a copy a year later. Tindale was eventually sentenced to death, but by that stage thousands of copies of his translation were already in use. 1559 The Vatican published its Librorum Prohibitorum index – a list of forbidden books – for the first time. This list was last produced in 1966. 1933 The Nazis held book-burnings in Germany. Any books regarded as anti-German were burnt. 2015 Militant members of Islamic State (ISIS) burnt more than…

‘WHEN people try to insult me they often resort to cliché: “He’s just a glorified porter,” they say. As if all I do is carry someone else’s bags for a few rounds of golf and wait for a tip at the end. A caddy’s job is so much more than what you see on TV. It’s eight hours a day, six days a week when a tournament is on, and anywhere from 20 to 40 weeks a year. At its most basic, caddying is about adding and subtracting. My main job is to tell the professional how far he is from his target – or, conversely, how far it is to a danger spot. But caddying is about so much more than that. Anyone can learn how to measure a…

I was particularly pleased with the manner in which your article about the transgender child was written (YOU, 3 December), specifically because you made use of the correct gender pronouns. While many do not (and perhaps choose not to) understand this family’s story, I applaud YOU for sharing it regardless. I believe many individuals and families who’ve read it will be able to relate and it will lead to a better sense of acceptance of themselves and/or their loved ones. We should acknowledge everyone is unique. We’re all trying our best to be ourselves and, more importantly, be happy without the judgment of others. My advice to those who are disgusted or truly believe transgenderism is an abomination is to do their research. It’s simply foolish to hate something you…

Queen Elizabeth (89) BRITAIN 63 years on the throne Married to Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh (94) Born in 1926 to Prince Albert, Duke of York, and Elizabeth, Duchess of York, little “Lilibet” was never expected to rule – until her uncle Edward, Prince of Wales, abdicated in 1936, resulting in her father becoming King George VI. In her lifetime she’s seen a world war and witnessed the death of her father, her beloved mom, sister and former daughter-in-law Princess Diana. In 2015 she made history by becoming the longest-reigning monarch in Britain. The queen has been married for 69 years, has four children, eight grandchildren and five great-grandchildren. She’s the first monarch to have seen three of her children divorce. Queen Sonja (78) NORWAY 25 years on the throne…

THE Swedish royal family have a busy year ahead on the baby front. The third generation of the snow-capped country’s bluebloods are expected to add another to their family by April. Crown Princess Victoria (38), heir to her 69-year-old father King Carl XVI Gustaf’s throne, is expecting her second child with her former personal trainer husband Prince Daniel (42). The couple, who married in a beautiful ceremony in Stockholm Cathedral in 2010, are parents to adorable Princess Estelle (3). In September 2015 the palace announced Estelle would be getting a sibling with Victoria due to give birth in March. It’s not yet known whether the royal nursery will be decorated in blue or pink, but thanks to the 1980 Act of Succession that introduced absolute primogeniture, Estelle will remain second-in-line…

STOCKISTS: ACKERMANS 0860-900-100, EDGARS 0800-203-925, JET 0800-203-925, PEP 0860-737-000, PICK N PAY CLOTHING 021-658-1000, SHOE CITY 0860-900-100, SPORTSCENE 0860-576-576, TOUGHEES 021-683-6690, WOOLWORTHS 0860-022-002 WE MAKE EVERY EFFORT TO PROVIDE ACCURATE PRICES BUT MISTAKES MAY OCCUR. YOU AND THE SUPPLIERS DO NOT BIND THEMSELVES TO THE PRICES PRINTED HERE.…

HAM AND MOZZARELLA PHYLLO PARCELS MAKES 12 PARCELS Preparation: 20 min Cooking: 15-20 min 6 phyllo pastry sheets 100 g butter, melted 250 g gypsy ham slices 150 g mozzarella cheese, grated 375 ml (1½ c) frozen garden peas, rinsed Preheat the oven to 180 °C and grease a baking sheet with nonstick spray. 1 Brush a phyllo pastry sheet with the melted butter and place another on top. Cut this double sheet into quarters. 2 Place a slice of ham at the bottom end of each quarter. 3 Mix the cheese and peas and spoon some of the mixture on the ham. Fold over once, tuck in the sides and roll up to the end. 4 Brush the parcel with butter. Repeat with all the filling and sheets. Chill…

HE SIMPLY CUT TIES WITH HIS MOTHER Q My 40-year-old husband hasn’t been in contact with his family for almost three years. His mother is the main reason – she poisoned his siblings against him because after years of her abuse, manipulation and aggression, he decided he’d had enough. He told me unless she has therapy he’s not interested in seeing her again. I understand how he feels as I’ve witnessed her terrible swearing, rages and unacceptable behaviour towards him and other people. He says it’s all he’s known since he was a young boy and he won’t have any more of it. But the thing that worries me is cutting off contact doesn’t seem to faze him. He has no plan to forgive her. His mother is almost 70.…

TRY AGAIN A professor doesn’t feel like lecturing so at the start of a lecture he gives his students enough problems to keep them busy for an hour. He’d just settled into his chair to read when a student interrupts him. “Sorry sir,” he says, “but do you have any more problems?” Taken by surprise the professor asks, “Do you mean you’ve already finished all the problems I gave you?” “No” the student says, “I couldn’t solve any of them. So I thought I might have better luck with some others” TRIED AND TESTED A minister is called away unexpectedly when a close family member falls ill, so he asks his young new assistant to deliver the Sunday sermon in his place. When he returns the minister asks his wife…

LISTEN TO THIS! BLUE NEIGHBOURHOOD TROYE SIVAN South Africans got to know the SAborn Australian star in his title role in the Spud movies, but with his debut album the 20-year-old shows there’s much more to him. On Blue Neighbourhood he sings about the loss of youth and the challenges of growing up, but it’s not a sentimental album – Troye’s unpretentious schoolboy voice is perfectly suited to the electro-pop production. There are loads of highlights, including Youth and Wild, which Taylor Swift has raved about on Twitter.…

‘GROWING up in Zimbabwe was a great adventure, but I didn’t see it as such. I spent my entire childhood in Africa. I couldn’t have written The No 1 Ladies’ Detective Agency books, which are set in Botswana, without the affection that gave me. The first book I owned as a child was called The Boys’ Book Of Merchant Shipping. It was full of pictures of ships with their tonnage. It must have been the most boring book imaginable, but I loved it to pieces. I slept with it under my pillow. I studied law at Edinburgh University, and then got my first job at Queen’s University in Belfast. It was at the height of the Troubles: bombs were going off, you’d hear gunfire. There, I discovered Irish writers such…

Just call me Fancy! got Fancy from Drake’s hit song while working in a Forever 21 store in Nashville, Tennessee, in the US. He felt free there, says the singer, who came out as gay at 20. “It was the first place I felt comfortable expressing myself – I started painting my nails, doing my make-up. I dyed my hair platinum blond, which was extremely outrageous. ” IN GOOD COMPANY The 24-year-old – real name Jake Hagood – is managed by Scooter Braun, the talent manager who discovered Justin Bieber. SECRET IDENTITY He kept his identity secret for months after the release of his debut single, Goodbye, because he wanted people to know his art before they knew him. But that didn’t stop them from guessing! “They thought I was…

Some stories easily capture the imagination and are popular with readers of all ages. Also popular are significant religious texts. The books on the right have been top sellers over the past half century. How many of them have you read? 1 The Bible................................................3,9 billion 2 Quotations From Chairman Mao Tse-Tung (The Little Red Book).......... 820 million 3 The Harry Potter series............ 400 million 4 Fifty Shades Of Grey ..................125 million 5 The Lord Of The Rings ................103 million 6 The Alchemist ...................................65 million 7 The Da Vinci Code............................57 million 8 The Twilight series ........................ 43 million 9 Gone With The Wind......................33 million 10 Think And Grow Rich ..................30 million…

Mammoths were alive when the Great Pyramid was being built. Actress Betty White (93) is older than sliced bread. From the time it was discovered to the time it was stripped of its status as a planet Pluto hadn’t made a full trip around the Sun. The lighter was invented in 1823 – before the match, which came in 1826. If you have 23 people in a room, there’s a 50 percent chance two of them have the same birthday. Harvard University was founded in 1636, before calculus existed. The last time France used a guillotine to execute someone was after Star Wars premiered – in September 1977. It’s never said in the nursery rhyme that Humpty Dumpty was an egg. Anne Frank and Martin Luther King Jnr were born…

Once they were just small fry on the small screen, landing guest roles or short stints on hit shows. • Amy Adams is unrecognisable as Jodi Melville, a fat-consuming being who made an appearance in the teen series Smallville. She went on to win several Golden Globes and has been nominated for an Academy Award five times. • You have to look closely to see Mila Kunis as Ashley in 7th Heaven, a role she played in 1996 and 1997. She’s a friend of one of the Camden kids and soon turns out to be a bit of a bad apple – a far cry from the ballerina she later played in Black Swan. • James Marsden, aka Cyclops/Scott Summers of X-Men fame, showed off his musical talent as Glenn…

CUPPING MARKS JENNIFER ANISTON (46) At the premiere of the TV movie Call Me Crazy in 2013 the Horrible Bosses 2 actress revealed cupping therapy marks on her back. Hot glass cups are used in the ancient Chinese treatment that’s said to remove toxins. FAKE TAN/ BRONZER OOPS KYLIE JENNER (18) She’s an ace at plumping up her pout, but the reality TV star clearly needs more practice in the cleavage-contouring department. ARIANA GRANDE (22) The One Last Time singer sported a patchy tan on her chest and face and finger marks on her shoulders at a recent beauty launch in London. FACE POWDER OVERKILL TAYLOR SWIFT (26) The usually flawless songbird was bust with unblended powder under her eyes last October. NICOLE KIDMAN (48) The actress sported a rather…

Katy Perry The This Is How We Do singer has gone from self-conscious girl-next-door to glitzy superstar. Angelina Jolie The actress and director has exchanged awkward and gawky for poised perfection. Blake Lively Ten years ago the actress was a typical California girl. Now she’s a red-carpet queen. Jennifer Lopez The Lila & Eve star has morphed from frumpy to daring fashionista. Jennifer Lawrence The elegant Oscar winner once wore red-carpet outfits more suited to a trip to the mall. Rita Ora The singer used to be a hot mess. Now she’s a well-groomed vamp who commands attention. Beyoncé It’s hard to believe the now flawlessly put-together diva once donned this outfit. Kate Winslet Back in the day hair and make-up were clearly not a priority for the Insurgent star.…