Innholdsfortegnelse for 8-Sep-16 i You South Africa

ICAN’T imagine what it would be like if I suddenly discovered my parents weren’t my parents. My identity, my memories, the woman I am today – all of it is so closely intertwined with my mom and dad. My heart goes out to Zephany, the young woman who had to deal with this kind of trauma at such a young age. How do you begin to deal with the pressure of having a “new” family, which is what her biological family no doubt is, and knowing the people who raised you aren’t the ones who brought you into this world? She’s brave, that much is clear. She’s held steady under relentless global attention and seems to be finding solace and stability with the man she’s called Daddy all her life.…

To Sunette Viljoen’s mom, shame on you for turning your back on your daughter for all these years and sending her off to Rio with no support (YOU, 1 September). Sunette, you’re an inspiration. As a nation we stand behind you and are so very proud of you. SHARON, MEADOWRIDGE I salute Alicia Keys who bravely decided not to wear make-up at the MTV VMAs. My partner has always said women look lovelier without make-up. MOXIE, SMS My husband and I were happily married until I found out hed had an affair. My problem is, I can’t forgive him. I really try; I’ve prayed about it and done counselling but nothing works. I have so much hate and anger towards him. It’s been two years but my heart won’t let…

SOUTH African cricket legend Jonty Rhodes and Ricky Ponting of Australia are sitting in a packed stadium in India, watching in astonishment as the batsman at the crease notches up one boundary after the next. During their cricketing days the pair were archrivals but now they’re firm friends and both are mesmerised as they watch the incredible batting performance taking place in front of them. “See how he plays every ball into a gap,” Ricky marvels. “It’s not luck; it’s genius.” High praise indeed, considering that, during his time as captain of Australia, Ricky shattered one batting record after the next. And the batsman whose praises he’s singing? None other than South Africa’s own AB de Villiers. Jonty shares this anecdote from 2015 in the foreword to AB: The Autobiography,…

HAIR Get your hair sleek and smooth by using specially formulated products. 1 Wash and condition, then towel-dry your hair. Use frizz-taming shampoo if you don’t have straight hair. 2 Apply a heat-styling product while your hair is damp. 3 Make loose curls using a straightener. When done, brush the curls out so they become waves. 4 Make a deep side parting with a tail comb. Finish off with a light setting hairspray. CHEEKS The secret to a beautiful contour and a natural glow lies in a bronzer and a highlighter. 1 Apply foundation. 2 Use a blush brush to apply blush. Start at your ear and move towards the apple of your cheek. 3 If you’d like to add a glow to your face, use a compact strobing powder…

WHEN she posted a picture of her brother and his newborn baby on Facebook, all Megan* was thinking about was how happy she was for him and his wife. It was their first child and the baby boy had come a few weeks earlier than expected but was doing well. So Megan was in a celebratory mood as she posted the picture of her brother in the neonatal ward, looking proudly at his two-day old son. She was doing what we all do on social media – she was sharing. As expected, her phone screen lit up periodically over the next hour as the stream of notifications came in when friends “liked” the picture and offered their congratulations. Then came something she didn’t expect – a phone call from her…

‘The loneliness you feel with another person, the wrong person, is the loneliest of all’ – AUTHOR DEB CALETTI HE ENDED THE AFFAIR BUT IT’S NOT THE SAME Q My husband had an affair that ended three years ago. He was a heavy drinker and blamed the affair on alcohol. He begged me to forgive him and has since stopped drinking, but things have changed. We had a great sex-life before I found out about the affair but he has failed to achieve an erection with me ever since. He says he loves me but I feel he must have loved the woman he had the affair with more. We’ve been for tests for sexually transmitted diseases and they all came back negative but my husband refuses to see a…

DOESN’T ADD UP Why couldn’t the blonde add 10 and 5 on a calculator? She couldn’t find the “10” button. L NOETH THE BLONDE WAY A blonde finds her flat is on fire and immediately calls the fire department. “We’re on our way” the operator says. “How do we get to you?” “I don’t know” the blonde says. “I suppose in your big red truck.” SURPRISE! A guy walks up to a sales assistant in a women’s clothing store. “I’d like to buy my wife a pretty pink scarf” he says. “How cute,” the assistant says. “Sounds as if it’s going to be a great surprise.” “It sure will be,” the guy says. “She’s expecting a new car.” T MOONSAMY SAME AGAIN, PLEASE A guy goes for a haircut. As…

YOU’VE heard about artists suffering for their art – well, forget them! These authors have paid their dues and now they’re laughing all the way to the bank. Among the six of them they made more than $181 million (R2,4 billion) in the past year, which makes them the world’s richest wordsmiths, according to Forbes magazine. Here’s how they did it. 1 JAMES PATTERSON $95 million (R1,28 billion) The reason the American thriller writer earns so much more than his peers is he’s a complete workaholic. In the past 12 months he has released more than a dozen titles – some of them collaborations with other authors. At 69, Patterson – who’s notched up sales of more than 350 million books since the release of his first novel in 1976…

FAMOUS BIRTHDAYS WORK AND MONEY: VIRGO . . . Maintains a neat and tidy workstation. Buys practical, useful items rather than status symbols and brand names. Makes for an organised, diligent and ultra-efficient employee. Strives for perfection in their work. Likes a service-orientated occupation. Virgo worries about everything, including money. Is modest about their achievements. VIRGO AUG 23 – SEPT 22 Jupiter brings abundance for the next year Jupiter, a planet of abundance, moves into your money horoscope this week to reside there for the next 12 months. Providing you play your cards right, you can look forward to a potentially positive cash flow. With Mercury still retracing its steps, this week is the perfect time to revise your budget and restructure your financial strategy. Be careful with financial transactions…

LIEZEL VAN DER WESTHUIZEN (radio presenter) “I’d buy blankets, food, collars and leashes for all the street dogs belonging to the homeless in Cape Town.” DANILO ACQUISTO (TV presenter) “A property from which I’d start running a religious community and soup kitchen. Or I’d build a new digital-video business and studio.” SHEKHINAH DONNELL (singer) “Time-share to disappear to for the weekend with my girls.” AMANDA DU-PONT (actress) “Depending on how much it is, I’d probably buy property. It’s a great asset to have.” KURT COLEMAN (rugby player) “A house where I’d have a room just for my Russell Athletic clothing, another room as a gym and another one set up as a PlayStation room and full of PS4 games”…

JAIMIE ALEXANDER is one tough woman! The 32-year-old actress recently tweeted that she’d broken her nose while filming her TV show Blindspot. But she managed to complete shooting the day’s scenes with co-star SULLIVAN STAPLETON (39) thanks to the help of “make-up magic” and ice packs. Just a few days earlier the raven-haired star, who plays the lead character of Jane Doe in the hit crime drama, posed for a snap with co-star UKWELI ROACH (29), who plays Dr Borden. “I’m always in Dr Borden’s office. I think I’m his favourite patient!” she captioned it. ROCKING INSTAGRAM 1 jaimieale xander Takes a village... #BLINDSPOT 2 jaimieale xander In our element. One of my favourite people to work with. (producer) @martingero #BLINDSPOT 3 jaimieale xander I’m always in Dr Borden’s office.…

JUSTIN BIEBER (22) and SOFIA RICHIE could barely keep their hands off each other during a recent romantic getaway in Mexico to celebrate the American model’s 18th birthday. The lovebirds were spotted kissing and hugging as they lounged around a hotel pool. According to a report in American magazine People, the pair have been enjoying a “love fest”, but the relationship isn’t that serious because the Canadian pop star travels so much. It also claimed Justin has known Sofia, youngest daughter of singer Lionel Richie (67), for a few years and always had his eye on her but waited until she was older to date her.…

chrishemsworth Just sellin papers with my mate @twhiddleston #parttimejob #thorragnarok @taikawaititi chrishemsworth Chris Evans chose not to work out for the next avengers movie, all good he’s still awesome #thorragnarok #thor #captainamerica #avengers #youthfulskin twhiddleston Now & Then. @chrishemsworth #thorragnarok #thor #loki chrishemsworth Met the real superheroes of the world at@ladycilentochildrenshospital. A huge shout out to all the brave kids who are an inspiration to all of us! @twhiddleston #madepossiblebychf #ladycilentochildrenshospital #juicedtv…

I’ve just had the misfortune to read the letter Don’t Spare The Rod (YOU Say, 25 August). The words “If you want to cry I’ll give you something to cry about” are words no small child should ever have to hear. “Hiding” is a cop-out word for beating and if this so-called gentleman thinks that beatings for children will turn them into gentlemen he has a lot to learn. Violence begets violence, and the way I showed my own son how to behave was like this: whenever he did something inappropriate – at home or out or wherever – Id immediately stop what I was doing and ask him to sit with me. Then I would quietly explain that the consequences of doing such and such would be bad. Id…

THEY say an apple a day keeps the doctor away. As summer approaches we tend to start eating more healthily, but occasionally we long for something sweet. This wonder fruit is ideal for baked treats. EASY APPLE CRUMBLE Great for breakfast or as dessert. SERVES 4-6 Preparation: 30 min Baking: 20-30 min FRUIT 2 Granny Smith apples, cored, peeled and cubed 2 pears, cored, peeled and cubed 4 plums or peaches, pitted and cut into pieces 125 ml (½ c) chopped dried pears or cranberries 125 ml (½ c) rooibos tea, fennel and aniseed flavour a little brown sugar (optional) CRUMBLE 50 g pumpkin seeds, toasted 25 g sesame seeds, toasted 50 g chopped pecan nuts 50 g coconut flakes 50 g ground almonds 7 ml (1½ t) Chinese five-spice…

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More and more couples don’t want guests to post pictures of their wedding because it’s their big day and they’d like to have control over what’s put out there for the world to see. What makes it difficult is there are no hard and fast rules, writer and social media expert Sarah Britten says. “Some couples ban photos while others actually choose a hashtag for their wedding – how they feel about it depends very much on how active they are on social media,” she says. If the bride-to-be has posted updates about every aspect of the wedding preparations in the days leading up to the ceremony it’s likely she’ll be comfortable with the wedding being shared on social media. “Couples should ideally make their preferences clear on the invitation,”…

A All ages D Drugs H Horror L Language N Nudity P Prejudice PG Parental guidance S Sex V Violence LISTEN TO THIS! EGOMANIAC KONGOS The band of brothers – who visited SA last month to play at Oppikoppi – don’t disappoint on their third studio album. With pounding drums and accordion at the fore they’ve carved out a sound of their own and on this album they expand on it. The first single, the radio-friendly Take It From Me, echoes their 2014 breakthrough hit, Come With Me Now, with its relentless drums and chanting chorus. The album’s vocals and songwriting are emotive and topical – check out these lyrics from Autocorrect: “In the future will I need my mind?/Or will Google take over this grind?” A worthwhile buy for…

NORA ROBERTS $15 million (R202 million) Known for: Her 209 romance novels. E.L. JAMES $14 million (R189 million) Known for: Her Fifty Shades Of Grey erotic trilogy. VERONICA ROTH $10 million (R135 million) Known for: Her bestselling sci-fi series, Divergent. JOHN GREEN $10 million (R135 million) Known for: Romantic weepy The Fault In Our Stars and Paper Towns. PAULA HAWKINS $10 million (R135 million) Known for: The Girl On The Train, which has been made into an upcoming movie starring Emily Blunt and Justin Theroux. GEORGE RR MARTIN $9,5 million (R128 million) Known for: The epic fantasy series A Song Of Ice And Fire, which has been adapted into the hugely popular Game Of Thrones TV series.…

HIT MASTER The 19-year-old DJ’s debut smash hit, Faded, clocked more than 595 million views on YouTube and in March this year it was the most Shazam-ed tune in the world! His latest track, Sing Me To Sleep, is just as infectious and is also storming the charts. On his list of favourite composers are Steve Jablonsky, who worked on the Transformers film series, and Hans Zimmer, who’s composed music for more than 150 films including The Lion King and The Dark Knight trilogy. FORGET FAME Alan is quite guarded on Instagram and mostly doesn’t show his face in snaps he shares with his 223 000 followers. “My main objective since I started uploading my music to the internet back in 2012 has never been to become famous…

THERE are more than 18 000 species of butterflies in the world. They’re among the most beautiful insects – but did you know they don’t have their colourful wings from birth? They begin their lives as caterpillars. Let’s find out more. LIFE CYCLE OF A BUTTERFLY 1 A butterfly’s life begins as an egg that hatches a small caterpillar. The caterpillar does little besides eat, storing energy in its body and getting steadily bigger as it does. 2 When the caterpillar is ready for the next step it changes into a pupa or chrysalis – a stage in which it’s encased in a hard shell that protects it from predators and bad weather. It attaches itself to the underside of a leaf, a branch or any other safe place. But…

‘I’m a human being. I feel everything to the core but I refuse to harden my heart’ DOLLY Parton is about to sing the opening lines of I Will Always Love You. It should begin, “If I should stay, I’ll only be in your way . . .” But on stage in the packed hockey arena overlooking the Mississippi in St Louis, Missouri, she suddenly halts proceedings. Something has got in her way. “Hold up, I think I sucked a bug down mah throat!” she drawls. With her usual self-deprecating humour, America’s queen of country laughs it off and launches into the ballad that made her rich three times: once in 1974, again in 1982 and, most obviously, via Whitney Houston and The Bodyguard in 1992 ( four times if…

INSIDE the blue carry-cot on the dining-room table are a soft baby blanket and a white card printed with a tiny pair of feet in blue ink. “Baby’s footprints” the card reads. But instead of a joyous announcement of his first child’s birth, it’s a reminder of Corné Hitge’s terrible loss. A tragic accident at a carwash has left his girlfriend dead along with the little boy theyd been so eagerly awaiting. Now, instead of embarking on life as a new family, Corné (28) is burying mother and child, who’ll be laid to rest in the same coffin. Heartbroken Corné is still trying to come to terms with the events of 13 August. His girlfriend, Belinda Louw (35), was 36 weeks pregnant and the couple were overjoyed at the impending…

‘I believe I was meant to experience hardships to appreciate what I have’ HE OOZES confidence on stage, he’s collaborated with one of South Africa’s biggest stars and his music videos get millions of views on YouTube. So the last thing we expect when we meet rapper Emtee is that he’ll be painfully shy. But the soft-spoken 23-year-old, whose real name is Mthembeni Ndevu, avoids eye contact and keeps his head bowed as he fidgets with his hands. “I’ve always been a weirdo,” he says. His shyness has led to him fleeing from fans who have mobbed him after live performances – which some admirers misinterpret as Emtee being full of himself. But actually, he says, he just can’t handle it. Since he burst onto the hip-hop scene early last…

Everything about MOONCHILD SANELLY (28) makes you sit up and take notice – her hair, her clothes, her music and even her name! The Port Elizabeth-born singer’s distinctive sound is an interesting blend that’s best described as Afro-electro pop. After the success of her debut record, Rabulapha – which earned her a Sama nomination for best alternative album – it comes as no surprise that she’s part of the line-up at next month’s Superbalist Is Rocking The Daisies festival at Cloof Wine Estate near Darling in the Western Cape. “I’m over the moon – pun intended – about it,” Moonchild says. “I’m coming up with new ideas on how to switch up my live show to give the Daisy Beams [festival attendees] something they’ve never seen from me.” She’s as…

JAMIE OLIVER and wife Jools (both 41) have finally settled on a name for their baby son. “It’s probably polite to formally introduce the new boy to you: his name is River Rocket Oliver. We think it suits him and he’s a little gift and we’re all very happy” the British chef wrote on Instagram. The couple are known for picking unusual names for their kids, whose full names are Poppy Honey Rosie (14), Daisy Boo Pamela (13), Petal Blossom Rainbow (7) and Buddy Bear Maurice (5). Is Joshua Jackson (38) dating his Affair co-star RUTH WILSON (34)? The two, who play a married couple in the TV series, were recently seen on a long lunch date at a New York restaurant. According to onlookers the actors chatted, ate and…

OPEN LETTER TO CHAD LE CLOS CHAD, when I read about both your parents struggling to overcome cancer (YOU, 11 August), the pain that has threatened to suffocate me for a year and a half grabbed me by the throat and squeezed a little tighter. You see, my strong, fiery dad is fighting for his life, struck down by mesothelioma, a particularly horrible form of cancer with little chance of survival. This time last year Id just come back from visiting my parents overseas. I didn’t show it but I was shocked by my once-proud dad’s decline. Chemo and surgery had reduced him to a shadow of his former self, knocking all the fight out him. He was depressed, often breaking down in tears. He’s not a tactile person but…

‘The name Zephany reminds her of turmoil and mess. She also knows the name she was raised with is a lie’ HIS sad eyes tell the story of the difficult year and a half he’s been through. But the wrinkles around them show that even in the midst of all the hurt he still knows how to laugh. Peter* is seated on the couch in his home and sitting next to him is Zephany, the girl who calls him “Daddy”, the girl he raised with his wife, Maria*, who was found guilty in March of kidnapping the teen when she was three days old. It’s the first time Peter and Zephany have invited us into their home. In an exclusive interview he speaks about the traumatic events of the past…

‘You’ve judged me, condemned me, stoned me and crucified me. That’s fine. I don’t care’ JUST one little tap on a screen to press “send” – that’s all it took. That one simple action sent a picture of her most intimate body part to a WhatsApp group for hockey parents at her daughter’s school instead of to her husband. Margaret van Wyk realised her mistake almost immediately and quickly apologised to the group, explaining shed intended to send the pic to her husband, Chris. She was embarrassed and cringed at the thought of the 17 participants in the group gawking at the image and having a good giggle. The 46-year-old mother of three knew what had happened would soon be all over their small town of Schweizer-Reneke in North West.…

More than 60 percent of South African teens have been drunk by the age of 18. Of these, 30 percent admitted to drinking during school and homework time. Almost half the learners (44,8%) who consume alcohol have engaged in binge-drinking (had five or more drinks in a few hours on one or more occasions, within a month). Learners generally consume alcohol on Saturdays, at parties and on other special occasions. They indicated that alcohol is used mainly to be socially acceptable or to escape problems. More than 63 percent admitted their parents didn’t know they were drinking alcohol.…

SPICY SCHNITZELS WITH RADISH SALAD SERVES 4 Preparation: 20 min Chilling: 15 min Cooking: 20 min 4 chicken breast fillets salt and freshly ground pepper oil for shallow frying SPICE MIXTURE 10 ml (2 t) paprika 2 ml (½ t) cayenne pepper 5 ml (1 t) ground cumin 5 ml (1 t) ground coriander COATING 125 ml (½ t) flour 2 eggs, whisked 750 ml (3 c) corn flakes, finely ground SALAD 120 g mixed salad greens 4-6 radishes, sliced 15 ml (1 T) olive oil 15 ml (1 T) lemon juice 1 Make a few incisions on the underside of each chicken breast and use the heel of your hand to flatten the meat. Season both sides with salt and pepper. 2 Spice mixture Mix all the ingredients well…

TIPS FOR CHOOSING DINNERWARE If you like to entertain, it’s best to have two dinner sets: a formal, ornate and delicate set to use on special occasions and a casual one consisting of long-lasting pieces for everyday use. White dishes are classic and versatile. Use them as a base and add colourful or printed bowls or side plates. Make sure your casual dinnerware is safe to use in the dishwasher, microwave and oven. Buy individual plates and bowls – this allows you to mix and match. STOCKISTS @HOME 0860-666-674; CHECKERS HYPER 0800-01-07-09; GAME 0861-4263-2273; H&M 086-0690-707; HOME ETC 011-476-3224, 021-551-3311; MAKRO 0860-300-999; MRP HOME 0800-212-535; PEP HOME 0860-737-000; PICK N PAY 0800-112-288; SHEET STREET 0800-212-535; WEYLANDTS 086-103-400; WOOLWORTHS 0860-100-987 WE MAKE EVERY EFFORT TO PROVIDE ACCURATE PRICES BUT MISTAKES MAY…

There’s no dignity quite so impressive and no independence quite so important as living within your means – FORMER AMERICAN PRESIDENT CALVIN COOLIDGE TALK TO YOUR BANK You’ve lost your job or you’re drowning in debt, or perhaps you’re just suffering a temporary unforeseen financial crisis in these difficult economic times. There could be many reasons why you can no longer afford to keep up your car finance repayments. But don’t just keep quiet and pray for a miracle – talk to your bank. Banks aren’t waiting for an opportunity to repossess your vehicle. Your Money spoke to Wes-Bank’s Rudolf Mahoney about the various options. DEBT COUNSELLING You’re in debt but still have a steady income. In this case the bank is likely to recommend you get debt counselling. Note:…

EYE IN THE SKY 2015. 102 min. 10-12PG V. War drama. R125* After a few average Hollywood movies, South African director Gavin Hood (Tsotsi) returns to form with this thought-provoking thriller that takes a gripping look at modern warfare and all its morally grey complexities. Commanding an international team – including a US Army drone pilot (Aaron Paul from Breaking Bad) in Nevada and a Kenyan field agent (Captain Phillips’ Barkhad Abdi) – via satellite while stationed at British military headquarters in England, Colonel Katherine Powell (Helen Mirren) has tracked a group of terrorists to a house in Nairobi, Kenya. She decides to order a drone strike but when a little girl (Aisha Takow) sets up a stall selling bread outside the terrorists’ hideout, her superiors start dithering about what…

WOLOLO by BABES WODUMO FT MAMPINTSHA This song has been all over radio and TV recently, putting the Durban-born songstress on the map. The infectious tune features Big Nuz member Mampintsha (Mandla Maphumulo) and is a must-have for your play-list. Not everyone’s a fan – some call her music “ratchet” – but hip-hop star Cassper Nyovest says she’s the future of music. Hate her or love her? You decide. TALK by DJ SNAKE He has a knack for turning out hit after hit and this song is no exception. The latest banging tune from the 30-year-old French DJ – the mastermind behind smashes such as Turn Down For What – puts a tropical spin on Aussie songstress George Maple’s 2014 track Talk Talk. It’s reminiscent of Snake’s 2015 hit Middle…

LIKE many 21-year-olds she loves dancing, going to the mall and watching movies. Her hair is styled in a funky two-tone ombré, she’s nuts about fashion and loves make-up so much she has her own vlog in which she does step-by-step tutorials. But Marimar Quiroa of California is in a league of her own. Born with a huge facial tumour called a cystic hygroma, she has challenges many young people would struggle to cope with. Yet not only has she refused to allow them to get her down, she has turned her condition into a triumph by choosing to embrace who she is and flip traditional concepts of beauty on their head. Two years ago Marimar started her video blog, giving make-up lessons in sign language. She says she got…

There’s no doubt about it – she’s a style icon! After all, she won the award for Most Stylish Female Celeb at YOU Spectacular. So what are the essentials fabulous TV presenter Bonang Matheba (29) simply has to have in her handbag? 1 MY CELLPHONE I absolutely can’t leave home without it! 2 MY SAMSUNG CAMERA I actually prefer taking images with a digital camera rather than a cellphone. 3 AN ASTHMA INHALER Because I’m asthmatic. 4 LIPSTICK AND LIPGLOSS My Revlon favourites, of course! 5 SUNGLASSES They’re my favourite fashion accessory – sunglasses complete every look. 6 MY WALLET Everything I need to function is in there.…

DATED SEAN ‘P DIDDY’ COMBS 1999 – 2001 They split after he was arrested over a club shooting. ENGAGED BEN AFFLECK 2002 – 2003 Ben hated the media attention. HUBBY #1 OJANI NOA 1997 – 1998 J Lo’s new-found fame was too much for him. HUBBY #2 CRIS JUDD 2001 – 2002 Cris hated his loss of privacy. HUBBY #3 MARC ANTHONY 2004 – 2014 He was too controlling.…

STAR LOOK JOE JONAS of the group DNCE – which won best new artist – with supermodel NAOMI CAMPBELL, who was sensational in a slinky white dress and introduced her friend Rihanna’s performance.…