Innholdsfortegnelse for 14-Jul-16 i You South Africa

I CAN’T get my head around men who try to dodge paying maintenance for their children. How can you sleep knowing you’re not doing right by the people you brought into this world – people who didn’t ask to be here? We receive so many letters about men who don’t help the mothers of their kids with food, clothes, medical costs, school fees and the many other expenses children rack up. These stories are devastating and move us to tears – but they also enrage us. Usually the women are so busy trying to keep things together they can’t take time off work to fight court battles against their exes and end up just dealing with it by making huge sacrifices. I’m in awe of moms who make it work…

Regarding CE Fowler’s letter about women not being like men (YOU Say, 30 June): I like beer and rugby, have a tattoo and drive an SUV. I’m also a wife, mom to three kids and a business owner. Put that in your pipe and smoke it, Mr Fowler. LYNDI SMITH, DURBAN I wonder how many readers noticed how much Princess Beatrice resembles her ancestor Queen Victoria on the cover (YOU, 9 June)? Many comparisons have been made between Kate and her husband’s cousins but each one has her own attributes. Live and let live. GRAN K, EMAIL The other day as I was reversing out of a crowded parking lot I heard loud hooting. I looked out the window and saw the driver of an SUV gesticulating wildly. He was…

ONE of the easiest and most effective ways to finish a room is to add a rug. Yet it’s an item you should consider carefully before buying. Flooring is often an afterthought and even when a rug is added, many times it’s done incorrectly. A large part of decorating with rugs is based on the principles of proportion, not to mention creating balance using colour, texture and an element of style. SCALE AND SIZE THE FIT A rug should be scaled to fit into the rest of your décor. A small rug in front of a large sofa seems miserly so it’s best to be generous and treat a rug as an anchor point for a room. If you have the space, place all your furniture on a rug. SIZE…

Oral hormone replacement therapy (HRT) is inexpensive, easy and the best known way of ingesting hormones, says Professor Alan Alperstein from Cape Town, a gynaecologist and former president of the South African Menopause Society (Sams). Women who use patches must replace them twice a week. They’re well suited to women who are lactose-intolerant, have a history of blood clots and suffer from migraines. You can also use oestrogen gels or implants. Gels are popular, but as they contain only oestrogen they’re suitable only for women who’ve had a hysterectomy. Women who still have their uterus need a combination of oestrogen and progesterone. This is because oestrogen on its own, when not balanced by progesterone, can stimulate growth of the uterus lining, increasing the risk of uterine cancer. Implants, which have…

Earth provides enough to satisfy every man’s need but not every man’s greed – CIVIL RIGHTS ACTIVIST MAHATMA GANDHI KNOW YOUR PONZI FROM YOUR PYRAMID Gullible people are easily conned by financial tricksters. Earlier this year Capitec Bank closed the accounts of more than 2 000 clients whod been linked to the MMM Ponzi scheme. If you invest in a Ponzi or pyramid scheme your money is used to “pay” new investors. Members of a Ponzi scheme believe they’re legally earning money from an investment while those of a pyramid scheme know they’re being “rewarded” for actively recruiting new members. In the end only the conmen behind the schemes win. WHY THEY COLLAPSE All these schemes eventually collapse, says Mike McDougall of the Actuarial Society of SA. First, they run…

CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR A blonde, a redhead and a brunette are lost in the desert when the brunette spots a lamp in the sand and picks it up. “Look at this,” she says to the others. “Perhaps it’s a magic lamp!” “Rub it and see what happens,” the redhead says. So the brunette rubs the lamp and, sure enough, a genie pops out. “I grant you each one wish,” he says. “I wish I was back at home,” the redhead says and – poof! – she’s back home. “I wish to be reunited with my family” the brunette says and – poof! – she’s back home with her family. “Aww!” the blonde says. “I wish my friends were here . . .” R NAIDOO GOOD FOR GRANDPA An…

COLD SHOULDER LOCNVILLE The local duo are turning out one infectious tune after another. First they hit us with Grapevine, the first single off their new album, Taste The Weekend. Now twins Andrew and Brian Chaplin team up with producer of the moment Sketchy Bongo for this banging, upbeat pop track that’s sure to be a hit with fans. “We focused on creating a uniquely African feel with an international flavour, which we think really comes across,” the pair say about their third record. HEATHENS TWENTY ONE PILOTS If you were a fan of the US band’s smash hit Stressed Out you’ll definitely want to give their latest tune a listen. It’s the first single off the soundtrack of the upcoming DC Comics antihero movie Suicide Squad and has a…

SHADOW CHARACTERS This weekend, instead of watching a movie, why don’t you create your own shadow show? On the right are ideas for characters – photocopy and enlarge them then trace the images onto thickish cardboard, cut them out and paste them onto a stick or bent hanger. HOW TO SET UP YOUR THEATRE Shadow theatre is an ancient way of telling stories. Before you begin, decide which characters will take part in your story and prepare the shadow puppets and other images (such as houses or trees) as explained above. Shine a light onto a sheet and tell your story by moving the puppets, other images and the light around behind it. You can also use a wall as a screen or a large white box placed on a…

‘We’ve visited the US . . . Getting them through security is challenging!’ SHE rocks her babies to sleep, treats them to outings and even takes them along when she goes on overseas trips. People look at her a bit strangely at times, she says, but she doesn’t care. The babies – all 35 of them – are her family and they make her happy. Silvia Heszterenyiova displays her infants all over her house in Sydney, Australia, and couldn’t be prouder of her brood. The babies are, of course, dolls – or reborns as they’re known. Made from vinyl, they have soft skins and amazingly lifelike features that have sparked a cult-like following around the world. But Silvia (42) is a collector in a class of her own – and…

There’s no stopping NANDI MNGOMA. From presenting to singing and now fashion designing, the 28-year-old sure is making her mark – and not only on the local scene. After hosting this year’s BET red-carpet extravaganza in Los Angeles, USA, the stylish beauty plans to go global with her fashion label. For the BETs Nandi wore a Xhosa-inspired number from her line, Colour, which is to be launched next month, and made such a splash she decided to set her sights beyond our borders. “In Africa we celebrate colour either by how we are as a people or in our aesthetic,” she says, explaining the reasoning behind the name of her brand. “I’ve always wanted a clothing line that represents the African continent in a light the world hasn’t yet seen.…

‘STANDING aside is the single best thing I can do.” These were the parting words of the now-former Top Gear host CHRIS EVANS (50) as he bid the show farewell after only one season as its presenter. The British former radio DJ made headlines on 4 July when he announced his departure from the BBC’s flagship car programme, but his retreat wasn’t his biggest headline-maker of the day. Hours earlier, police confirmed a woman is accusing Evans of sexual assault over an incident in the ’90s in which he’s claimed to have grabbed a co-worker’s breasts. Evans is keeping mum on the allegations and took to Twitter to thank the team behind Top Gear. “Gave it my best shot but sometimes that’s not enough. The team are beyond brilliant. I…

Their romance has tongues wagging but TOM HIDDLESTON (35) and TAYLOR SWIFT (26) aren’t slowing down. The British actor wore a T-shirt reading “I love T.S.” and the pair sported matching temporary heart-tattoos with each other’s initials while frolicking on the beach near her home in Rhode Island in the US recently. The pair were celebrating Independence Day with friends including models KARLIE KLOSS and GIGI HADID as well as a pregnant BLAKE LIVELY and her hubby RYAN REYNOLDS. E! Online sources say the songbird, who ended her 15-month romance with DJ Calvin Harris just weeks before she started dating Tom, is smitten.…

CHICKEN LIVER PIZZA WHEELS SERVES 4 Preparation: 20 min Cooking: 15-20 min 15 ml (1 T) olive oil 15 ml (1 T) butter 1 onion, chopped 2 garlic cloves, crushed 250 g chicken livers, roughly chopped 30 ml (2 T) tomato purée 15 ml (1 T) brown sugar salt and freshly ground pepper PIZZA WHEELS 1 kg readymade bread dough 45 ml (3 T) sweet chilli sauce 100 g mozzarella cheese, grated 10 g fresh parsley, chopped 30 ml (2 T) olive oil Preheat the oven to 190 °C. Line a baking sheet with baking paper and grease with nonstick spray. 1 Heat the oil and butter in a pan and fry the onion and garlic until fragrant. 2 Add the livers and stir-fry for 5 minutes. Add the tomato…

JACKETS, COATS AND TOPS PEAR SHAPE Detail around the neck makes your shoulders look bigger. HOURGLASS Tops should be narrower at the waist and flatter your breasts. UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE Choose simple, straight lines and wrap tops. DRESSES, PANTS AND SKIRTS PEAR SHAPE Knee-length skirts and dresses flatter this body shape. HOURGLASS Wear low necklines and pencil skirts. UPSIDE-DOWN TRIANGLE Pants that flare at the bottom suit this body shape. ROUND OFF YOUR OUTFIT IN STYLE ACCESSORIES BAGS GO TO THE YOU SHOP AT SPREE.CO.ZA/YOU OR GO TO YOU.CO.ZA AND CLICK ON SPREE FOR MORE WOMEN’S FASHION. STOCKISTS ACKERMANS 0860-900-100; COLETTE BY COLETTE HAYMAN 021-937-5465; COTTON ON 011-230-2940; EDGARS 0800-203-925; FOOTWORK 011-345-8000; FOREVER NEW 021-419-4552; FOSCHINI 0860-104-764; H&M 021-826-7300; YOU SHOP AT SPREE.CO.ZA/YOU (OR GO TO YOU.CO.ZA AND CLICK ON…

Few things are as much of a nuisance to women in menopause as hot flushes. They occur because the lower oestrogen levels in the body confuse the “internal thermostat” that controls your body temperature, says Dr Tobie de Villiers, a gynaecologist at Mediclinic Panorama in Cape Town. “Women can also suffer from the shivers or cold flushes.” It was previously thought 20 percent of menopausal women get hot flushes but recent research shows almost 40 percent of women going through menopause experience this sudden feeling of warmth that spreads around the body and lasts anything from 30 seconds to a few minutes. Hot flushes often increase skin temperature and pulse, and may be accompanied by flushed (reddened) skin, palpitations (feeling a strong heartbeat) and sweating. They can also make it…

HUMBLE ASPIRATIONS His success in Hollywood took Sam (30) by surprise. The third of four sons born to finance officer Mark and classroom assistant Sue in Ipswich, England, Sam wanted to play soccer until an ankle injury put paid to his dream. His parents persuaded him to pursue acting and after graduating at the London Academy of Music and Dramatic Art he had six months of rejection before landing a few TV roles. Then he bagged a part in 2011’s Pirates Of The Caribbean: On Stranger Tides and his career took off. “To be 100 percent honest I didn’t have Hollywood in my sights when I left drama school. I just never assumed it was possible – I had no higher hopes than to be on the stage in some…

FAMOUS BIRTHDAYS WATER SIGNS CANCER, SCORPIO AND PISCES . . . Function well in the realm of feelings and emotions. Are sensitive and compassionate. Have a well-developed sixth sense. Go with the flow. Are prone to moodiness. Lack objectivity and are irrational. Are ruled by their emotions. CANCER JUNE 21 – JULY 21 Your imagination and creativity is stimulated The week has a strong emotional undertone. But don’t worry, you’re in your element and likely to take it in your stride. You’ll probably find it easy to express yourself and to make your feelings known, whether in your personal or professional relationships. With your imagination stimulated it’s also an excellent time to let your creative juices flow, whether through music or another art form. YOUR LUCKY NUMBERS 15, 31, 16,…

‘I’ve never been drunk, never been arrested’ SHE made waves in 2010 with Room, a harrowing novel told from the perspective of a five-year-old boy who’s being held captive in a room with his mother. Now Emma Donoghue (46) is back with a new novel, Frog Music. The Irish-Canadian author opens up about her writing habits and what makes her tick. On Frog Music It’s about a little girl in Ireland in the 1850s who doesn’t eat [this was before anorexia was identified]. Back then if you had a kid who wasn’t eating, all sorts of theories would swirl around. Some would see her as physically sick, others emotionally sick, others super-powered. I love historical fiction. There are all sorts of historical continuities in life but the past is always…

TiMO says . . . 1 I learnt to speak Portuguese on the internet. 2 I used to make most of my money playing poker when I was younger. 3 If I could I’d eat chicken five times a day. 4 I love soup. 5 Sometimes I go thrift-shopping. SORRY, HE’S TAKEN! The lucky lady he snogs in his music video Find My Way is his girlfriend of almost three years, Alexandra Harrison (21). “It was cool but super awkward making out in front of all the film crew. We had to do that scene about 10 times,” he says. CELEB CRUSH His celeb crush is Game Of Thrones star Emilia Clarke (29). “But only when she’s Daenerys Targaryen [in the show] because .…

She describes herself as a grab-your-bag-and-go kind of girl, so we were keen to see what YOU Spectacular Most Stylish Female nominee DINEO MOEKETSI keeps in her handbag. We asked her to give us a sneak peek. GREEN TEA I’m obsessed with it. I love a quick cup if I have a minute in between takes – it helps keep me calm. A GOOD PAIR OF SHADES I have a manic schedule and never know if I’ll be driving around or in the sun shooting. HEADPHONES Essential for between takes. It’s great to shut out the world for a bit, especially in the middle of the hustle and bustle of daily life. WALLET Where would you be without all your cards! LIPSTICK A quick swipe of colour always makes you…

A SINGLE ACT OF CARING GROWING up during World War 2 with a German surname (Schroeder) wasn’t easy as it precluded my father from obtaining permanent employment. My mother kept the wheels turning with her home industries business and we had a home, food, clothing and schooling but no luxuries. But my mother taught us many valuable lessons and these I’ve passed on to my daughter. It so happened that in Muizenberg, Cape Town, my daughter noticed a homeless woman approaching her. As she drew nearer my daughter instinctively reached for her purse, whereupon the woman said, “I don’t need money, I just need a hug.” So there they were, so unalike but drawn together in a single act of caring. I can’t help but wonder whether the lessons my…

OUTSIDE a childrens gym in Los Angeles a black SUV pulls up and out steps a woman in leggings and a vest, almost incognito behind dark glasses, a cap covering her blonde hair. But it’s Charlize Theron, her baby girl, August, on her hip and her son in tow – and yes, that is young Jackson rocking a red braid, pastel dress and turquoise pumps. This isn’t the first time we’ve seen the four-year-old in accessories and outfits usually intended for girls. Jackson sported a long blonde wig for an outing with Mom last year, donned a princess-style dress for a kids’ birthday party in February and was wearing pink ballet-style shoes when he threw that infamous tantrum in a parking lot in March after a dance class (YOU, 10…

AT FIRST his parents thought he had croup – the 19-month-old was feverish, was having trouble breathing and was clearly in a bad way. But instead of taking little Ezekiel to the doctor David and Collet Stephan fed him a series of homemade remedies – including a concoction of whey protein, olive-leaf extract, water mixed with maple syrup and a juice made with frozen berries. Two weeks later the boy’s condition had worsened dramatically. By now his parents were trying hot peppers, garlic, onions and horseradish but nothing was working. Family friend Terry Meynders, a nurse whod assisted in Ezekiel’s home birth, warned the Stephans he could have meningitis and urged them to get medical help. They refused, choosing to rather drive to a naturopath to pick up a mixture…

THE next time your teen asks you for airtime theres no need for it to come out of your pocket. They can easily earn it themselves – and the best part is they’ll be doing it by revising their schoolwork. Sound too good to be true? It’s not. TendoPro, a new online learning tool, rewards users for completing tutorials and watching educational videos with a currency that can be used to buy airtime. The website, co-founded by social entrepreneur Jerome Maggerman and a social work student Ellen Betridge is aimed at learners in Grades 8 to 12. Jerome says they want to provide an online platform for learning that is “highly engaging, fun and interactive” and can be accessed via a smartphone, tablet or PC. Learners have to register to…

MOST South Africans have sat down with family or friends to enjoy mouthwatering KFC chicken. KFC staff in more than 800 restaurants across SA have been highly trained to make sure you enjoy the same delicious taste, every time. SA’s favourite chicken restaurant now guarantees that if any customer is not fully satisfied with the quality and taste of their meal, it will be replaced. It’s called the Taste Guarantee promise. HOW CAN KFC GUARANTEE GREAT TASTE? The great quality chicken you enjoy is the best available in the country – it’s sourced from the same local chicken farms that supply South Africa’s premium retailers. All the fresh ingredients are locally sourced and delivered three times a week to guarantee freshness. All products are dated and held for a limited…

NAILING IT MIDAS TOUCH One of the best ways to wear glitter is on your nails. Pair a glitter nail polish with a solid colour, such as black, to create a striking contrast. Or paint your nails in shimmery gold or silver with black nail art for a dramatic look (RIGHT). TIP Effortlessly disguise chipped nail polish by applying glitter nail polish over it. SPARKLING EYES Shimmer on the eyes is synonymous with glamour. The great thing is that it’s available in so many colours. Choose bright colours to grab attention, or go for darker tones for a more mysterious look. LUMINOUS SKIN Glowing skin is easy to achieve with products that add a subtle sheen. These products contain light-reflecting particles that make your skin radiate beautifully. GOLDILOCKS Healthy hair…

PERIMENOPAUSE Your periods will become less regular, deviating by up to seven days from the average 28-day cycle. In the late stage of perimenopause you may not menstruate for up to 60 days or more, after which your normal cycle resumes. This transitional phase can last for up to three years until you reach menopause. MENOPAUSE When you haven’t had a period in about a year, you’ve reached menopause. Hot flushes are common at this point. Many women also experience anxiety, depression, mood swings, poor concentration, insomnia, vaginal dryness and joint pain. POST-MENOPAUSE Urological problems may occur, so watch out for bladder infections. Recent research shows many women continue to suffer hot flushes in this phase – and for some it continues for the rest of their life.…

‘No man is rich enough to buy back his past’ - AUTHOR AND POET OSCAR WILDE LOSING MY JOB IS GETTING TO ME Q I recently lost my job when my company downsized and a lot of us were retrenched. Although I got a good package it’s left me feeling devastated. My job was important to me and it feels as if I’ve lost my identity even though I’m a professional person (attorney) and can practise on my own. The company I was retrenched from was a good one to work for and I always felt safe and secure in my job. Now it feels as if the rug has been pulled from under my feet. I feel like a failure. What do I do? Benjamin, email A Being retrenched…

THE DANISH GIRL 2015. 116 min. 16N. Biopic. R129* Set in Copenhagen in the ’20s and based on the bestselling book of the same name by David Ebershoff, this fictionalised account follows Danish artist Lili Elbe (Eddie Redmayne) – a transgender woman and one of the first recipients of gender reassignment surgery – and her wife, Gerda Wegener (Alicia Vikander), also an artist, as she discovers her true self and transitions from Einar Wegener to Lili. This intimate and emotional film is, at its core, a love story. Gerda’s love, acceptance and support of Lili, and Lili’s courage in pursuing her dreams in the face of tremendous adversity, are triumphs and relevant today in a world that’s still obsessed with gender conformity. Though there’s heartbreak for the couple, there’s also…

LISTEN TO THIS! THE GETAWAY RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS Kicked off by first single Dark Necessities, the Peppers’ 11th studio album sees them ditching longtime producer hip-hop/rock maestro Rick Rubin for pop guru Danger Mouse. But fans will be pleased to hear the trademark Peppers sound is intact – from Flea’s slap-bass grooves to Anthony Kiedis’ staccato raps and poetic lyrics on his favourite subjects: sex, drugs and death (Feasting On The Flowers is an ode to late Peppers guitarist Hillel Slovak). Kiedis says half the songs are about a relationship “that fell apart like a nuclear bomb, leaving me raw and available to the emotional universe for writing”. A must for fans. – NICI DE WET NEW ON THE BIG SCREEN / MR. RIGHT BLACK COMEDY. With SAM ROCKWELL…

ON THE face of it she’s just like any other nine-year-old. She enjoys playing with her friends and siblings, jumping on the trampoline, watching TV and stroking the family dog, Diamond. But how many other tweens have published a book, won an award for it, addressed students and academics at the University of the Witwatersrand and given talks to more than 800 learners at various Johannesburg schools? Welcome to the world of Stacey Fru, one of South Africa’s youngest authors. The ambitious young writer hopes to have written 12 books by the time she reaches Grade 10 and her second endeavour is already well on its way. “I just love being creative,” the pretty little girl says, chatting to us at her family’s five-bedroom home in Waverley, Joburg. “I also…

Almost a third of South Africans have high blood pressure IT’S a killer and it’s sitting right there on your table. It s also hiding in your bread, breakfast cereal, viennas and noodles – and plenty of other foods. Salt is the condiment we use every day, often without thinking about it. But the health department has put its foot down and wants South Africans to think twice before reaching for the salt shaker – because it leads to a condition that kills more people worldwide than any other. “Too much salt on a regular basis leads to high blood pressure, which is the biggest cause of heart attacks and heart failure,” says Irene Labuschagne, a dietician at Nicus, the Nutrition Information Centre of the University of Stellenbosch’s faculty of…

Muscleman Maurice! “My workout plan at the moment is intense,” actor Maurice Paige says. “And because I have a fast metabolism I eat twice as much as I should. I’m eating a lot of carbs now because I’m bulking up, as well as a lot of protein and veggies. I have two potatoes and 12 eggs in the morning – that’s my breakfast.” His gym regimen includes 45 minutes of cardio and a 20-minute ab workout in the morning, as well as two hours of weight-training in the evening. His fellow contestants in Tropika Island Of Treasure had better watch out – actor Maurice Paige has just won a bodybuilding competition and he’s ready to play hard for that R1 million cash prize! “I’m going to give it my…

He’s a TV veteran so Jamie Bartlett is the perfect person to fill one of the judge’s seats on SA’s Got Talent when it returns in September. The Rhythm City actor replaces TV presenter Lalla Hirayama on the judging panel and says he’s looking forward to discovering new talent on the show. We put him in the hot seat for a quick quiz. 1 thing you’d tell your teenage self? There’s no substitute for hard work. 2 places you’d run away to? Chirundu on the mighty Zambezi River in Zimbabwe and Khartoum, the Sudanese capital, at the confluence of the Blue and White Nile. 3 people you’d like to go for a drink/dinner with? My friend [British actor] Chiwetel Ejiofor, my special person and a friend from primary school, Nicholas…

Koko: it’s a party, y’all! The gang’s all here! KHLOÉ KARDASHIAN recently celebrated her 32nd birthday with a huge bash at Dave & Busters restaurant in Hollywood. Among the guests were her brother, ROB KARDASHIAN, and soon-to-be sister-in-law BLAC CHYNA, whose secret engagement drama played out on the family’s reality show Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Chyna looked ecstatic to be in the inner circle and happily posed for snaps with momager KRIS JENNER, former bestie KIM KARDASHIAN and one-time frenemy KYLIE JENNER. Even Kim’s three-year-old daughter, NORTH WEST, joined in the fun, pulling faces with Auntie Khlo. Rob and Chyna are apparently getting their own reality show (naturally) and plan to get hitched before their baby’s birth in October. THEY’RE BACK TOGETHER! KYLIE (18) and TYGA (26) are on…

MILA KUNIS The Jupiter Ascending actress and her husband, ASHTON KUTCHER (38), are counting down the days to the arrival of their second child. MILA (32) recently showed off her growing bump during an outing with her hubby and their 21-month-old daughter, WYATT, in Beverly Hills. If rumours are to be believed the lovebirds, who’ve known each other for 18 years since meeting on the set of That ’70s Show, are expecting twins. The Two And A Half Men actor is reportedly buying two sets of everything. MEANWHILE . . . DEMI IN CRISIS Ashton Kutcher’s ex-wife, DEMI MOORE (53), is going through a rough patch after three failed marriages. The actress has cut herself off from family and friends and her dramatic weight loss is also causing concern.…

LOUIS TOMLINSON (24) is reportedly fed up with Briana Jungwirth (23), who’s denying him access to their five-month-old son, Freddie. The One Direction singer is going to court seeking joint custody. Louis reportedly pays Briana about $15 000 (R217 500) a month in child support. The custody battle might have been sparked by the stylist’s jealousy over his new relationship with The Originals actress Danielle Campbell (21), a source close to Briana says. SARAH JESSICA PARKER (51) and MATTHEW BRODERICK (54) are apparently working hard on their 19-year marriage – a move they’ve dubbed “conscious coupling”. The actors, who have seven-year-old twin daughters, Marion and Tabitha, and a son, James (13), ditched their old home and bought two adjoining townhouses in New York in a bid to save their marriage.…