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Life is difficult. This simple but powerful truth is acknowledged by people from all walks of life: the course of any person’s life does never run completely smooth. There will be challenges along the way but it’s not the challenges that shape your life, it’s you and how you deal with those challenges. One strategy for dealing with life would be the “hold your breath and hope for the best” approach, but you can only go so far with your head in the sand. A far better way to deal with life is to make yourself the best that you can be so that you can deal with whatever life throws at you, both good and bad. That’s where life coaches come in handy because they provide insight and guidance.…

What makes you, you? Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Do you subscribe to a personality type or does your star sign say everything about you? Is personality shaped by nature or nurture? Or is it a combination of both? Personality is complex in its disposition and composition but deceptively simple in its presentation as it is on display every day. We say someone is fun or frivolous, serious or sympathetic as we arbitrarily pigeon-hole people’s personalities. But like so many things in life, what you see is not always what it seems. Similar to your fingerprint, your personality is unique and one of a kind. It comprises many moving parts and morphs over time. Pinning down your personality is like catching a cloud. So let’s get personal. Opposites…

“‘I think I can,’ puffed the little locomotive, and put itself in front of the great heavy train. As it went on the little engine kept bravely puffing faster and faster, ‘I think I can, I think I can, I think I can.’ Then as it neared the top of the grade that had so discouraged the larger engines it went more slowly, but still kept saying, ‘I — think — I — can, I — think — I — can.’ It reached the top by dint of brave effort and then went on down the grade, congratulating itself, ‘I thought I could, I thought I could.’” —from The Little Engine That Could by Watty Piper It’s well known that humans are creatures of habit. Habitual thoughts are the precursors…

Most experts agree that there are three main types of personal communication: passive, aggressive and assertive. While there are combinations of these, there is most often confusion between what it is to be assertive in life and what it is to be aggressive. Unfortunately, many of us think we are being assertive when in fact we are being belligerent, demanding, stubborn, rude or even threatening. The art of assertiveness, however, is much less about wielding a club and more about encouragement and persuasion, about self-esteem and confidence. It’s about being true to your values, respecting others and not crossing a line that compromises who you are. What is assertiveness? Being assertive means communicating your needs, wants, feelings, beliefs and opinions to others in a direct and honest manner while being…

Most of you will have heard about the Laws of Attraction and many of you will have experimented with techniques learned from the myriad books and films available on the subject. Perhaps, despite your concerted efforts, you didn’t quite succeed in manifesting your desires or you got mixed results. If you’re feeling confused and disappointed, you’re not alone. But don’t despair — a change in perspective could provide the shift you need to make attraction work better for you. Like attracts like To attract the things you want, you need to draw in the right people at the right time. This is important to remember when it comes to all your relationships: romantic, professional or otherwise. One of the best ways to attract is to start with looking at what…

Always be a first-rate version of yourself and not a second-rate version of someone else.Judy Garland When it comes to being you, authenticity is something that we often struggle with. It is too easy to be caught up by who you think you should be, who others want you to be and attempts to be a conglomeration of those you admire and even envy. The constant bombardment with images of what you should aspire to be and have can cloud your judgement and draw you away from a true understanding of who you are and what is important to you. Fear of what you might find during the process of self-discovery can prevent you from even trying to understand yourself. Yet knowing the answer to the question “Who am I?”…

Have you ever felt you wanted more out of life but did not know exactly what you wanted or where to start? Or maybe you have already decided you want to make some changes, but what next? Starting on your journey can be daunting as there seems to be so much to do but no clear path to do it or even where to start. Well, today’s your lucky day: get out your notepad and let’s get started. Step 1. Make a list — a small one! What would you like to change about yourself and your life? Make a list of all the things you want to tackle about yourself and your life. If you’re having trouble pinpointing what you want to change, think about where and how you…

For so many of us, discipline is a dirty word, conjuring up images of toil and labour as we strive toward impossible goals which we inevitably abandon. But discipline doesn’t need to be about deprivation and drudgery. If you are prepared to view it differently, then it can become your ally helping you to live your best life. The Dalai Lama even goes as far to say that “a disciplined mind leads to happiness, while an undisciplined mind leads to suffering”. So perhaps it’s time to become a disciple of discipline. Re-defining discipline When you think of the word discipline all sorts of connotations may come to mind. We instantly feel straight-jacketed by a sense of strictness, regulation, and restraint. Our lexicon of living well has changed in recent years…

Are there areas of your life where you don’t feel like you’re in the driver’s seat? Where you resort to reacting to events in ways that make them more pear shaped rather than responding with awareness in ways that help? Most of us struggle, at least occasionally, with certain areas of life. Confrontation and conflict, failure and setbacks, present common struggles. Then there’s the good stuff like success, which can be something we struggle with just as much. Learning to respond to success with gratitude and pleasure is just as important to your growth as learning to cope with failure and conflict. Below are ways to help put you back in the driver’s seat. Conflict and difficult people If a conflict has left you reeling or simply feeling uncomfortable a…

Confidence is a much sought-after quality. Everyone believes that some degree of confidence is a good thing. You are encouraged from all quarters to go confidently in the direction of your dreams as if confidence itself has the capacity to make those dreams manifest. Certainly, when it comes to growing and developing as a person confidence has an important role to play but it is not the entirety of the issue. Humility is also part of the equation. While they are often thought of as being at opposite ends of the spectrum, confidence and humility are actually closely aligned and humility is itself a type of confidence. Whether confident or humble, though, the real issue is how do you create — or find — these qualities within yourself if they…

Intricate to the journey of life is discovering what your true talents are and how you can use them in your everyday life. Perhaps you have a knack of communicating difficult concepts or love helping other people work through their problems; or do you get a buzz every time you cook food for the people you love? Exploring what your talents are, and then pursuing them, is a sure-fire way to living an authentic life. Finding your thing Lucy Whittington, a UK specialist in helping people discover how to turn their ideas and talents into successful businesses, calls your talent your “thing”: the thing that makes you happier, work faster and feel more fulfilled than anything else. “By ‘thing’,” says Whittington, “I mean the thing that they do easily and…

Are there things in your life, small or large, that you’d like to achieve but don’t feel you have enough motivation, confidence or skills? Perhaps you believe achieving them will help you become healthier, happier, more satisfied, inspired or fulfilled. Are you passionate about living your most powerful life? Is there something incredible you’ve thought of which, if achieved, would leave a legacy behind you, something you could look back on and be really proud of? If your answer to any of these questions is yes, then perhaps goal setting is for you. Why set goals? Incorporating goals into your life can be like using a sat-nav. Without one you might eventually reach your destination, but with one you’ll have a more direct journey. Goal setting is about helping you…

Growth and achievement require change — they go hand in hand. While change is what everyone seeks as they embark on a journey of self-growth and improvement, so many of us seem to stumble when change comes along. Why is it that when you’re actively seeking to change your life, you find yourself defensive, aggressive and falling back into old habits? How do you go about breaking down those defences to ensure you can continue to grow throughout life and achieve the goals you set for yourself? Why do we have defences? Defences are past habits, patterns and excuses that you fall back on when your life is going through massive change or upheaval. While you might have all the good intentions in the world to make your life better,…

The history of communication goes back thousands of years. It has evolved from arguably basic forms of verbal and written communication such as grunts and pictographs to complex languages and the ability to communicate globally with the touch of a few keys. Whatever the type of communication used however, the point is that human beings have always needed to get their message across to one another. We are social beings out of necessity and emotional need and our communication skills either help to build or harm our relationships. Your communication skills are the means by which you move through the world each day. Whether you’re making arrangements with family or friends, negotiating a business deal, buying a coffee or organising a holiday, it is necessary for you to use a…

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I, I took the one less travelled by, And that has made all the difference. —Robert Frost Have you ever wondered how many decisions you make each day? Some are made so habitually that you’re barely aware of them: Where will I sit? What will I have for breakfast? Which sock/shoe will I put on first? Others you spend hours, weeks, even years deliberating about. Still others cause so much paralysis they are never made and you end up bobbing along with the tide going wherever you get pulled until one day you wonder: How did I get here? Shaping a life The kinds of decisions that change the course of your life also shape your character — they build on your past…